Updated: Sep 24, 2018
Personal development is a simple, efficient and rewarding way to become a better human. After all, think about it; If we don’t invest in ourselves who should?
Start by stepping out of your comfort zone one toe at the time, you'll quickly acquire a strong and positive habit of challenging your comfort zone to get the thrill.
I have started this blog at the beginning of the year (2018), I have to admit it is still feeling very uncomfortable - Which is a good thing by the way. As for me it shows I care therefore will get it right one day.
So when I came across this quote from Dr Seuss on Tim Ferriss’ twitter feed today, I smiled.
“Be who you are, and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”
It was exactly what I needed to ponder on to convince my sheepish ego that feeling uncomfortable, because I might not get it right or might get judged negatively was not the way forward and only focus on 'those who matter'. After all, I'm doing it for the first time, so normal to feel unsettled but not a good enough reason to not do it or not share my life findings since I started my coaching journey.
What about you? Do you remember that big meeting you were so stressed about, no matter how well prepared you were? And what about job interviews? Hopefully, I'm not the only one who felt like drinking a glass of wine (By the way, I’m not adventurous when it comes to alcohols) at 10 am to 'relax' before the interview?
In my case, I have realised that the more I care about something, the more I get worried about messing it up. So started to reassure myself by saying that if I care that much I'll crack it, as I have spent a lot of time preparing for whatever is stressing me so much. I used to doubt myself by questioning my capacities rather than just accept it as stress because I care.
Tip: start by acknowledging your stress or internal chatter: "Yes you are here stress, however, I know why: because I'm prepared because I care."
When you don't acknowledge your stress, your ego creates a negative habit very likely to become a ‘limiting belief’.
‘Limiting’ because of my sheepish ego which panics when facing the unknown and consistently tells me that I'm better to stay where it feels comfortable to get me to remain in my (safe) comfort zone.
The typical affirmation that comes to my mind, in that case, is: It won't work... I’m not good enough. I must to do this before (i.e. procrastinating),...
Once you have agreed with yourself to acknowledge this type of negative thoughts, an alarm will gently ring; your worrying ego is feeling uncomfortable and will do its best to stop you.
Once again, the first step when it happens is to recognise that it is your ego reacting to stop you and its reaction is not based on evidence that it would not be a success.
It is based on the worry about the unknown, therefore the quicker this unknown the sooner it will become a new positive mindset.
In fact, you are about to break a limiting mechanism which is one the fundamental coaching processes. You are coaching yourself by recognising first that there is ‘negative noise’ from your ego and that the disruptive noise is around for one reason: limiting you to what you know. Consequently this mechanism bounds your personal development to where you are now, rather than forging your ability to expand your life to new experiences and challenges.
Does this post sound obvious to you? Please take a moment to reflect on the last time you had to push yourself hard to accomplish something. Did you not take these negative thoughts as the truth and let them alter your judgement on your talents and capabilities?
The lesson I learnt today, you will recognise yourself as my audience and appreciate who I am and where I want to travel with you. THerefore no more excuses, I must step out of my comfort zone, like writing blog posts as it will get easier and more comfortable, it will become an habit, at that point, I’ll tackle my next challenge: sharing them on social media and so on.
I’m doing my bit, what about you? What are you going to start acknowledging first?
Let me know what your capricious ego gets you to procrastinate on and make sure you commit in the comments below.
Get in contact at firstname.lastname@example.org to pursue the conversation and create magic sooner rather than later.
Speak soon, Aline x